Saturday, April 30, 2016

I Just Wish

I Would Stop Giving Myself Such A Hard Time!

Thursday, April 28, 2016

Surfing the Mood Swings

So, today & yesterday were both very much better. Thankful!

Sunday, April 24, 2016

Miasma, with sparkles

Life may be short, but it's wide.

I feel like I'm just slogging along.  Trying not to hate on myself over the ridiculousness of weight gain. Went clothes shopping at Goodwill yesterday & about cried in the dressing room as i don't have a full-length mirror at home. It's much worse than i thought.

And, i have a car & work i love, family & friends, health & strength & sanity (most days anyway). So I'm better off than many. Suffering is suffering.

Please, thank you, please, thank you. Breathe in & out.


Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Oh, the mundanity!

It's difficult to type on this tablet.

Thursday, April 07, 2016

I Dunno

Weird weather, cloudy n overcast. We hit 91 yesterday but by early next week it'll be in the 60s again.

I received Deeksha for the first time last night.  It was a little strange, and i didn't sleep well afterwards, but I'll refrain from drawing a conclusion just now. I'm sure it will be fine.

Guess I'm a bit of a skeptic going in. I've been hearing about it for a few years now and never felt drawn to investigate further, but my BFF asked me to go with her last night as some of her fave practitioners are here on a visit from Hawai'i, so i decided to go along.  If I grow fins or something, will let you know.


Tuesday, April 05, 2016


This entire world is illusory and yet i am certainly partial to particulars about it. The wisp of energy i still feel between that fellow and myself is a reminder that i seek connection, without remembering that there is nothing else. He and i are certainly connected in a true "wireless" fashion, but i have stopped sending sexual longing through that channel, and therefore feel much less in return. Sigh.

May i never feel the urge or the need to remind someone exactly why i'm so wonderful. May i accept my intrinsic wonderfulness without the urge or need to have that recognition bolstered by anyone outside of me. May my wonderfulness be reflected in the eyes of all i encounter as i show them theirs.