ongoing....

i caved, i called.

could i possibly not see that as caving? could i see that as *extending* myself instead?

i know the Buddhist stuff is always about selfless action. but i am a real baby sometimes and want to be coddled. then if it doesn't go down my way, i flip and split--quietly; i don't make giant shrieking speeches like my stepmother used to. but yeah, i'm edgy and unhappy and just plain worn out. and i haven't done jack for the past week. no gym visits. staying up too late. etc.

self-care is kinda low on the priority list right now and i KNOW it's sabotage. and it's an inside job too! :p