rattle and hum

i am not sure what is going on with me, but something sure is!

maybe it's the fruit smoothies, maybe it's the raw salads, maybe it's the daily QiGong exercises--but something seems to be plumbing the depths of my being--and spewing out some pretty gross stuff.

my dreams have been vivid and powerful as well. the other night i woke with the remnant of a phrase in my mind: "Live on the border between emptiness and meaning."

(in Buddhism, "emptiness" refers not to a void of nothingness; but instead to the fact that things, in and of themselves, do not have their own meaning/being [i am probably botching this up, so forgive me]. our minds project and assign meaning to all things, based on our experiences.

("seeing emptiness directly" is another way of talking about achieving enlightenment, and means that we transcend the limits of our this-life mindstream and see all things as empty of meaning, shining with pure potentiality.

(at least i think that's sort of how it goes.)

at any rate, that is one cosmic phrase to decorate my brain with. i think there is a massive redesign happening, and it's uncomfortable as hell.

raw foods are really powerful cleansers. this i know. the QiGong guy spent a couple of hours the first day talking about the importance of raw foods to keep our immune system well-armed. and it's true, raw foods do contain everything in the proper ratios. in his opinion, juicing (since it removes the fiber) strips foods of much of their essential phytochemicals, which are in the cellulose.

i've been blending up wonderful fruit concoctions every day since the seminar: peach, plum, blueberries, strawberries, kiwi, a little water and sometimes a fat dollop of plain yogurt. they taste wonderful and are having a good cleansing effect.

i sure hope the cleansing of my mind and attitudes is just as effective (and over soon!).